Dear Avery and Oliver,
You won't remember this, but I will. You won't remember this, but when you were both just beginning your lives, life around you turned from something so predictable into something unprecedented. The corona virus has become a pandemic and it has thrown the world into utter chaos. You won't remember this, but crazy people bought out every store of toilet paper and people began to panic (don't worry - we have plenty of toilet paper and no I did not hoard it). You won't remember this, but national sports leagues, concerts and international flights have been canceled or postponed. Even Disney closed their doors. You won't remember this Avery, but your school closed. All classes were canceled. Older children are learning from home on their computers. You lost out on some of your favorite days. You are smart though, you know something is different. You miss your friends, you miss your teachers and you miss your routine. Being three, this is nothing you can quite comprehend so you're told "You'll see your friends again soon." And I hope that I am right. You won't remember this, but the virus is spreading fast, most people are staying home, except your mom. I go to work every day, do my best to stay healthy (constantly washing my hands to the point of discomfort), help others rehabilitate and then come back home. I leave my boots and clothes in the garage. I come inside and right away get greeted by the biggest "MOMMY!" from you Avery and the biggest drooly smile from you Oliver. All I want to do is pick you both up and give you hugs and kisses, but I don't. Instead I quickly say hi and run upstairs to shower, change into clean clothes, wash my hands for the umpteenth time and then find your smiles again. You won't remember this, but I will. We are practicing "social distancing". We stay home instead of taking you to do fun things like go to the park, go out to eat, or go to a friend's house. Instead we play out in the back yard, we order take out and we FaceTime with friends. We are doing our part to keep ourselves healthy and to keep others around us healthy too. You won't remember this Oliver but you're turning a year old during a major pandemic. On your birthday, it will likely be only be mommy, daddy and Avery who get to celebrate with you. It is certainly not how I imagined your first birthday to go, but I am thankful for what we have and for being together as a family.
This continues to unfold as I write this letter to you. I know you won’t remember the chaos, but here is what I do hope you remember: how loved and safe you feel right now. The fun of having daddy home every day and watching him work in his home office. Playing outside in the backyard in search of treasures and collecting “Olaf hands” (aka branches). Playing school with Mimi during the week; practicing coloring, cutting with scissors and reading lots of books. Pretending to be Miss Carol at gym class in our basement; completing obstacle courses you create with your gym equipment. Oliver learning to stand on his own and taking his first attempts at walking. Wrestling with each other and playing together in your playroom. Snuggling up to watch Frozen 2 or Star Wars and having dance parties in the kitchen. These are the memories I hope you make. There are no guarantees. It is still possible that we might get sick despite our best efforts. We are doing our best to protect you. After this letter is written things will continue to change. But one thing that will never change is how much love and security you will have and (more importantly) FEEL during these times. People are panicking. Your mom and dad are being cautious, prepared and of course, worried for our safety and health. And we worry about the safety and health of the ones around us and the ones we love. But that’s not a burden meant for you. We will be okay. If the only memories you have from this time are good ones, then I did my job.
Love,
Mom
